Paint Your Toes

Summer is here.

Which means sandal season is here.

Which means people have to see my feet,

And my disgusting toes. 

Luckily there is a way to fix this! 

With a pedicure! 

And since I'm sure some of you are as broke as I am, that means we have to do it ourselves. 

STEP ONE: Blank Canvas

In Step One we prepare our nails by 
a. Removing old nail polish
b. Filing them
c. Trimming them
d. And if you want to be extra special: Buff them

STEP TWO: It's Jacuzzi time! 

Soak your feet for 4-5 minutes
(If you are doing your hands, they only need 2-3) 

STEP THREE: Cuticles! 

You know those pieces of skin at the bottom of your nails? (And no, I do not mean your fingers.) 
Those are your cuticles and the key to having professional looking manicure or pedicure is to shove those cuticles (which are now really really soft) back against the other fleshy part (This time I actually do mean your finger) 

Some people push the cuticles back with their fingers and others use a special tool just for the job. If you are using you fingernails and are not doing a manicure, then you need to make sure they are really clean so that you don't shove dirt and germs under your cuticles. 

STEP FOUR: Moisture is a good thing

A pedicure (or manicure) isn't just about your nails. It's about the whole foot (or hand.) So grab some hand lotion and rub it on! 

Before we get to the fun part though, you need to take some nail polish remover and clean off your nails. Becuase you just rubbed lotion all over your hands and there is bound to be some on your nails and if you have oily lotion, your nail polish won't stick.

STEP FIVE: Nope. Not the fun part yet. 
Base coat! This is literally just clear nail polish. You can find it in your grocery store under clear nail polish, base coat or top coat! 

Using a base coat makes things last longer. So if you just want your nails to fade and chip off by the end of the week (so that you can paint them again!) I give you permission to skip this stage


Take out your favorite nail polish and paint it on. The professional (oooh. Professional) way is to paint down the middle first and then do both sides. 

STEP SEVEN: Literally just Step Five....again.

And now you put a top coat on! (Make sure your nails dry between Steps 5-7)

STEP EIGHT: You know you do it
Now sit patiently and wait for it to dry. 



Oh, well. It's pretty dry now. I won't ruin it if I move three inches. 


You now have smeared nails! 



  1. Okay, this was just hilarious. "Congratulations, you now have smeared nails."

    My fingernails chip so quickly, but I just let them stay that way for a while before I finally paint them. My toes last longer. I also like how you said, "Which means people have to see my feet. And my disgusting toes."

    Lol, this article was funny.

    Okay, now on to a stupid question. (I'm aware this is a very stupid question, but I'm somewhat new to your blog.)

    Are there two people running this blog?
    God bless you!

    1. Hi Ivie! No it is not a stupid question, stupid questions don't exist.

      To answer your question, yes there is two of us here :)

      Thanks for commenting!


    2. No! There is just one of us and she is crazy and thinks she is two people. Just toss her a cookie and stay back. I don't know if it catches :)

    3. And of course that last one was Kat. All the crazy answers are from her.

    4. Lol, y'all are funny. I knew there was a Kat and Lia, which is why I knew it was a stupid question, but I wasn't sure if you were sisters or friends or related. Or alter egos. There's that, too, lol.

  2. I've given up on my feet...there's no hope. That's why I usually just wear my converse except if I'm swimming!

    1. I just paint a bright color on my feet and no one really gets close enough to look at the state of my toes so i'm good!!!


  3. Kat, this is so funny! I love your posts!

    My little sister loves to do my toes so I don't really have to worry about it (except the drying process) but she and I really liked this! Thank you!